Been taking it super easy. Walking like a snail, if snails could walk. Upping my pace for a few seconds, then easing down. That dull awesome pain that creeps up the back, the stabby pinch under the right buttock, the other stabby pinch in the right hip, all reminders that I am not a super hero, and that the invincible delusion of youth does flutter away when seasons are coming to an end.
Freakin tragic.
Thus I write and watch/listen to hours of people sputtering of the times we're living in. It's kinda gross right now, what's out there. I think it's always been gross, but with the advent of cyberville (which sounds so ancient), this communal vast space we all share, whether silent observers, world criers, or the angry lunatic, we just have more access to the ugliness, and thus the ugly have a more difficult time hiding.
The only good thing, the only silver lining, is that I'm writing. It's starting slow. The characters are pretty much formed, but they also grow and reveal more about themselves as the pages mount. I need to streamline more, not go off track, keep motives in tact, and not lose sight of the main story.
And given this lack of mobility, which confines me in this tragic way, not feeling free to go about for fears of sudden unbearable pain whilst in a very populated area, I keep my tracks close to home and spend less hours outdoors. Believe me, my jeans are getting snug. A girls' worst nightmare realized. Vanity sucks.
I've been trying to fill time watching films with a large ensemble cast, one with many storylines running through. Just watched August Osage. It was great, performance wise, but story wise...what was the story about truly? I may stick to a few favs like: Hanna and her Sisters, and Parenthood. I'm watching and re-watching because my script also has many storylines. One family, many storylines, but the family is the glue.
And there isn't much on television and in film these days, been avoiding it for a while. Like, why so much bloodletting? When I was younger it wasn't an issue, or maybe there wasn't so much then, maybe now the options are growing slim.
So until my back procedure, and until this pain decreases by 40% I will reroute and continue to restore.
Pain pain go away. Come back never.
