Someone said "he's a nice guy". I replied, "oh, good. I like nice people."
Maddening me
Sits in a tree
Wants to be
Someplace else
I can do a bad ramble when bored. When confused even. It's either that or I become silent. To steer conversation away from the dull rub.
I can't bear a quiet table. I'll fill it. Even if I'm unimpressed. I'm Canadian. We're polite that way. Especially when circumstances make it so leaving, questioning, being a down right b**h is not an option.
So I met a fellow writer. I love meeting writers who enjoy the craft. I feel less alone and afraid of the big bad world when I know someone else feels the same way I do about the process. How freakin' awful it can be sometimes. How incredibly lonely it can be. How shameful it can be, to be in the endless stage of never feeling like you're getting ahead while all your friends are living a "normal" life filled with kids, in-laws, mortgages and a 9-5 job that brings an acceptable level of contentment.
He spoke. In a manner that I wasn't sure if he was mocking me or if he just spoke that way. You can only assess that when seeing him speak to others. He kept using my name in sentences when asking questions, ie: "So, Betty-Boop, why did you decide to do that?"
I thought nothing of it the first time, but by the third time he used it he was clearly giving me the hint that he doesn't engage with women often.
Side note: I always retain jewels of wisdom that my friends drop. Like this guy Mark I knew long back. He lived by a code: Never reveal more than you have to, especially when it has to do with your life.
Mark was huge into conspiracies which made our conversations so much fun.
I always keep Mark's wisdom for life in mind. He's very smart, Cute Mark. But yesterday I was off the Mark.
Like I said. I was kinda bored, not getting a clear picture of the person sitting in front of me. Bored.
But that was yesterday. Today is 4:05am. Los Angeles time.
And in this town where people say they know people, cause that's just the ramble people gamble in day-to-day talk. I'll eventually find a soul that speaks truth, writes, is comfortably human, and more than just "nice".
